I have had this discussion many times before, with schoolmates, varsity friends and colleagues. What Chinese name NOT to give your child. Or more precisely, what Chinese names are taboo. Taboo in the sense that the name would be a source of ridicule for the poor child.
Names can mean well, but may sound obscene and/or funny in Hokkien. So here's a short list
1. Bee Leng (smell breast)
2. Bee Lan (smell dick)
3. Chee Fai (sounds like ciba*... tooot. i.e. vagina) Especially if your surname is Chow, Tan, Lau, So, Teoh (like tiu) or worst, Mak. Have a junior in school with that name. His classmates will shout out his name when the principal passes by.
4. Kim Lan (sounds like gim lan (hold cock). Imagine your teacher calling out in class Ai Kim Lam, siapa Ai Kim Lan? - who wants to hold cock?
5. Pek Lan (white dick or force open dick)
6. Siew Lan (sounds like keeping/uphold lan)
7. Poh Leng (hug breast)
8. Tong Hai (eastern sea sounds like touch vagina)
9. Poh Lan (tsk tsk tsk precious dick or bo lan, no dick or poh lan - hug dick)
10.Poh Yao (sounds like poh hiao - pondan)
11. Ling Ling (or Leng Leng) - Lau Leng Leng (saggy boobs), Kiew Leng Leng (wrinkly breast or pull breast)
12.So Leng (caress breast)
In school, I had a classmate named A** Bee Lan (surname bleeped to protect her identity). One of my classmates started this thing by calling her A** Bee and not saying the Lan word. Realising that a large number of us were doing that, she inquired, of which the answer is:
My mother say cannot use bad word, so I call you A** Bee only lah!
See, bad for her to make us say notti words all day, all year. No wonder we didn't do well in exams, lol.
Chinese ppl like to check and see if the name is good i.e. tian ge, di ge, zong ge and ren ge are all good. Whilst it may sound beautiful in Mandarin, the anglicised equivalent, usually influenced by the dialectic tongue of the parent, might might end up sounding embarrassingly obscene.
Look at what a well-known blogger had to say bout her kids' names here.
If I have kids, I will give them names like Keat Kee, Keat Leng, Chio Leng, Ewe Pang, Sua Leng (good/powerful stick, good or full breast, beautiful breast or rubber, Oil pump, hill breast). Nah...just kidding.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Penang Hill - Naik Separuh Jalan
Being a Penangite, I have many fond memories of trips up the hill, whether by foot or the funicular train. When one of the local papers featured the woes of the hill station recently, it kinda got me tickled to read that only the lower section of the train is working. What good is it to go only halfway??
(http://thestar.com.my/metro/story.asp?file=/2008/10/31/north/2386055&sec=north) and http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/10/7/nation/2206358&sec=nation
Thank goodness for the 4WDs and the jeep track. Then again, it does sound like what goes on in a lot of places over here; doing things that get you halfway and needing others to pitch in to get it to work. With its lifeline cut off, the peak must be a pretty quiet place these days.
Which got me thinking - what can you do up in Penang Hill. There are no theme parks, no casinos, no good restaurants (nope, English restaurant doesn't qualify as fine dining, lol), heck nothing. Yet many people find the hill interesting. I suspect the ride up the hill in that cramped (no so cramped nowadays) train has got something to do with it. In it you hear kids say "Mommy, why so slow one?", "Cannot go faster ah?", "Mommy I need to pee pee woh", and I must envisage that it could be a lovers/perverts heaven, with bodies being pressed against each other (well, butts touching, elbows bumping etc, you get my drift).
Nay, the best way to go up the hill is.....to walk. Yes, to take a leisurely stroll up the hill, so to speak. And then take the train down, to safe your knees from damage walking down hill. No doubt your muscles might protest a little, but it would be a learning experience.
Now, once up there, you are confounded by the issue of what to do. Which is the actual reason for this post - top 10 things to do up the hill.....
So let me start with
No. 10 - See leng lui/leng chai (pretty girls and handsome boys)
You must have too much free time at hand if this is what you intend to do up there. Spend time sitting around the peak, looking at people walking by; big ones, small ones, tall dark or short and chubby. A good way to waste your free time plus the breeze is much cooler, with nothing much to spend on (as opposed to doing so at shopping malls). So very seh one (very thrifty) this activity. Except that food might be an issue, since the brain uses a large amount of glucose when you are ogling things....
Yalah, very toooot...
(http://thestar.com.my/metro/story.asp?file=/2008/10/31/north/2386055&sec=north) and http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/10/7/nation/2206358&sec=nation
Thank goodness for the 4WDs and the jeep track. Then again, it does sound like what goes on in a lot of places over here; doing things that get you halfway and needing others to pitch in to get it to work. With its lifeline cut off, the peak must be a pretty quiet place these days.
Which got me thinking - what can you do up in Penang Hill. There are no theme parks, no casinos, no good restaurants (nope, English restaurant doesn't qualify as fine dining, lol), heck nothing. Yet many people find the hill interesting. I suspect the ride up the hill in that cramped (no so cramped nowadays) train has got something to do with it. In it you hear kids say "Mommy, why so slow one?", "Cannot go faster ah?", "Mommy I need to pee pee woh", and I must envisage that it could be a lovers/perverts heaven, with bodies being pressed against each other (well, butts touching, elbows bumping etc, you get my drift).
Nay, the best way to go up the hill is.....to walk. Yes, to take a leisurely stroll up the hill, so to speak. And then take the train down, to safe your knees from damage walking down hill. No doubt your muscles might protest a little, but it would be a learning experience.
Now, once up there, you are confounded by the issue of what to do. Which is the actual reason for this post - top 10 things to do up the hill.....
So let me start with
No. 10 - See leng lui/leng chai (pretty girls and handsome boys)
You must have too much free time at hand if this is what you intend to do up there. Spend time sitting around the peak, looking at people walking by; big ones, small ones, tall dark or short and chubby. A good way to waste your free time plus the breeze is much cooler, with nothing much to spend on (as opposed to doing so at shopping malls). So very seh one (very thrifty) this activity. Except that food might be an issue, since the brain uses a large amount of glucose when you are ogling things....
Yalah, very toooot...
A post to start off my blog
It is funny how every time I feel that I have tonnes of stuff to write, but whenever I am faced with the computer or pen and paper, those thoughts and ideas just vanishes into thin air. Not that it was substantial to begin with, but nevertheless it it quite frightening to contemplate the ability of our brain to hold so much and yet to recall so little. A pointless discussion, you say? Yes indeed.
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